EXPLORATION 2011!!!!

Thursday November 10, 2011
As I prepare to make the journey to St. Louis tomorrow morning, I must say there isn't a bone in my body that isn't excited about this weekend. I began the week preparing; tires rotated on the car, oil checked and clean, bills paid, assignments done, clothes washed, car cleaned on the inside!!! (finally), gps charged, clothes packed, and my heart and mind is SO READY. I don't think I've ever been more excited about anything.
I haven't been on a trip that was for me since I went on my Chrysalis Flight in 2005, and boy was that an experience I will never forget. I must say, that not having anything to do with the planning and executing of this event has been very relieving but also has me wondering what is going to happen when I arrive at the Millennium Hotel tomorrow afternoon.
I am anxious. Nervous because I am traveling by myself, arriving by myself, and I'm really not quite sure what to expect....(maybe I shouldn't have started writing this entry..I'm getting more nervous the more I type!)
I'm beyond excited. Excited about Community; spending the weekend with about 200 other young adults who share a common call and interest. Fellowship; meeting, talking, and listening to/with other young adults stories and journeys. Growth; spiritual, emotional, mental, individual. I am beyond excited to see what God has in store for me this weekend.
I want to save the majority of the blog to update during the event, so I will end this here, shortly. I hope you will all continue to be in prayer for me, the other participants, adult volunteers and the design team this weekend.
Grace, Peace, & Love
C.


Friday November 11, 2011
WOW GOD! Okay, so let me take you along my journey. I left Jacksonville a little after 7 am and arrived in St. Louis shortly after 1 pm. The drive wasn't that bad--I only stopped once for a stretch/potty/gas break. I stopped in Blytheville, AR and decided not to stop because the gas station and entire area was suspicious and I didn't feel safe getting out of my car alone, so I drove another 20 miles and stopped in some town about 15 minutes into Missouri. 
Here's a few things I know: I HATE 18 wheelers. Driving 6 hrs by yourself is boring, but KLOVE and diet coke make it SOOO much better. Okay, so enough about the drive cuz it's the boring and not exciting part.
SO. I get here, checked into the hotel, drop my bags off in my room and go down for registration where I pick up my name tag and bag of goodies. Then I have til dinner at 5 pm to do whatever. I decide to explore St. Louis. The gateway arch is literally a block and a half away from the hotel I'm staying at...so I walked around St. Louis for about 2 hours. Honestly, there's really not much to see in this area. And I didn't want to walk too far away from the hotel--it's cold.
A little before 5 I made my way down to the ground floor, where all the festivities are taking place this weekend, and visited with a few representatives and current students from some of the seminaries. I am even more confused than before on my seminary choice. This is the area I need prayer the most right now, I DON'T want this to be a rushed, last minute decision. But I want to take the time I need...
Dinner. The tables were set up by conference, so I was sitting with others from my conference. There were 5 other people, all males, other than myself. Funny thing--I went to governor's school with one of them! Small world. I had a really good conversation with two of the guys there about ministry in general, Facebook/media, and our conference among other things. We could have gone on for hours! It was a great conversation and it reconfirmed that I am not alone in all of this.
Let's get to the good part--WORSHIP. I'm not quite sure where to begin. The whole experience of worship tonight was amazing. Mark Miller and the rest of the band are phenomenal. During Blessed Be Your Name, a song that is so familiar to me, I raised my hands...my hand was clinched in almost a fist like I was holding on to something--fear, self doubt, and other insecurities. My body shook and I opened up my hand. It literally felt like I let go of all the things holding me back.
Reverend Adam Hamilton--What can I say? Inspirational. Phenomenal. Life Changing. There are so many statements Rev. Hamilton made, I can't even begin to describe them all, as I am still processing them. I do know that my call was confirmed in a countless amount of ways tonight through Rev. Hamilton's words. I've come to recognize when God is touching me or speaking to me--I've never heard God's voice but my body does some weird things and I have received confirmation of things through other people. It was hot in the ballroom where worship was being held. But at certain times my body would get cold and chills would consume my body. This is a familiar feeling to me when I feel the Holy Spirit coming over me. 
Small group was awesome. The first day is usually a little awkward; everyone is still trying to get to know everyone else and it's just....awkward, usually. 
So now, as I write this blog..the first thought that comes to my mind is how tired I am...I am exhausted (so I'm sorry if this doesn't make any sense because I honestly have no idea what I"m typing). Anyways, there's a group of about six young adults sitting on the couches surrounding mine, they seem pretty cool. They had a guy come over and play his guitar earlier (he's actually from Arkansas!). They're from Jacksonville, TX.  Cool, I guess you know, since I'm from Jacksonville, ARKANSAS! haha anyways. Across the way there's this guy playing guitar and harmonica..yeah, it's pretty legit.  And there are a lot of people walking around...I haven't met my roommate yet, so I'm hoping that goes well. And now a different guy is playing a ukelele. Interesting. Yay for some Jason Mraz. Anyways I'm tired and I'm going to go to bed.
Hope you've enjoyed this post. I'm sure tomorrow is going to be AMAZING. We have a busy busy schedule..and I have to come to the lobby to get internet access, so I'm not sure if I'll update tomorrow or not. We'll sees how I feel. Anyways. 
Chao for now,
C.


Sunday November 13, 2011
I'm just going to do an overview of the rest of the weekend. For me, the details, as I outlined on Friday, aren't important--it's what the weekend as a whole did for me. Sure there were little parts and people throughout the weekend that impacted me.
When I arrived in St. Louis on Friday, I wasn't sure what to expect--I went in without any expectations about who I was going to meet, the types of relationships I was going to build, and how God was going to move me this weekend. I have to be honest, I didn't have one of those profound God moments. But I didn't need it. 
God provided for me exactly what I needed this weekend. In the midst of my crazy, busy senior year of college where there's not enough time in a day and I never seem to get caught up on assignments or studying. In the midst of anxiety, fear, and uncertainty. In the midst of distraction and tiredness.  In the midst of it all with this weekend, God provided to me a sense of  calmness and peace. It was such a powerful weekend; We worshiped together. We ate together (as good Methodists, of course!) We shared together. We listened together. We prayed together; we were prayed over, prayed for and prayed for others & ourselves. We were a community of believers who have felt the call to lead the church. We were all in different palces-some had everything figured out and some had no idea what they were doing there. 
My call to ordained ministry was confirmed in so many ways this weekend--through prayer, through the speakers, through song...just about every way possible. I have never felt the calmness and peace I felt this weekend. It felt right. The more I talked about my call, the more excited I got about it. The more I shared with others the more I realized that there is nothing else in this world I want to do than to lead God's people.  I feel EMPOWERED, ENCOURAGED, and EXCITED. 
I feel empowered as a woman and as a young adult--folks, the United Methodist Church isn't going to die. I believe my generation isn't going to let it. Over 600 people gathered in St. Louis this weekend. I'm not sure how many actually committed to ordained ministry, but I can tell you that at least 98% of them committed to some type of servanthood and leadership within the church. ALL young adults between the ages of 18 and 26. It was so awesome to see so many young adults excited and passionate about the church.
I feel encouraged to do God's work. To listen more affectively. To live more affectively. And I am SO excited about the journey that lies ahead. 

[[here's a link to a story that was done in the local St. Louis newspaper on Exploration--cool, huh?!

CLICK HERE FOR THE ARTICLE!! :P]]

(this is it for now, i'm exhausted and have to be up early in the AM for work tomorrow, so I will update and add more at a later date! enjoy for now!)
GP&L,
Corey


November 14, 2011
I'm really not sure what else to say..I'm still processing this weekend.
God provided for me exactly what I needed--peace and calmness in the middle of chaos.
Countless prayers were said, and many were answered within the 48 hour period of being in St. Louis.
I can sense a change inside me--again, I'm still processing everything so I'm not exactly sure what this means. But I feel so much more okay...Okay with my call, with sharing it, and with admitting it. It feels right.
I have found much freedom in Christ; I've found a new type of freedom in beginning the journey toward answering my call to ministry. The more I admit it, accept it, and share it--the freer I feel.
God moved in so many unexpected ways this weekend--I didn't experience a "slap in the face" encounter with God, that's not what I needed.  I experienced God in a loving, intimate, compassionate, and almost sneaky way. Like a quiet whisper that you would miss if you making just enough noise.
I met people that I'm pretty sure I've gotten closer to since leaving than I was when we were in St. Louis.
Overall it was an amazing, amazing weekend that only strengthened my relationship with Christ and brothers and sisters. It is a weekend I will be able to share for a lifetime...it's now a part of my story, of my journey.
Thank you everyone who prayed for me and others for this weekend. Thank you everyone who has been praying and who will continue to pray--I truly feel like there are days when I am walking on clouds of prayer; that's how powerful they are!! I am truly so blessed to be in a community of people who willingly and without thought wrap their loving, encouraging, and supporting arms around me. God is good, yes? YES!
I end this by saying: "Here I am Lord, Send Me!"